Where Has All the Romance Gone?

This is a question that I've been thinking about a lot lately.  Now I would by no means consider myself an expert on romance, seeing as I've only been married for a total of eight years (and that includes 6 years of being married to my ex and 2 years of being married to Justin).  I have had a few long-term relationships in addition to my marriages, and the same thing always seems to happen...romance at first, then bang, pop, fizzle-not in a good way.  I can remember when Justin and I first started dating, back in the summer of 2007.  We would cook dinner for each other, bring each other flowers, give each other "just because" cards, go on fun dates, etc.  Of course I realize that many, if not most, relationships begin just like this.  We probably kept this going throughout the first year of our marriage, and then we started TTC.  I of course wanted a honeymoon baby, so we definitely did our part when we were in Riveria Maya, Mexico!  No baby that month.  I had been charting for a few months at that point and started using OPKs as well, so I would say that this was probably the beginning of the breaking point of romance.  When you are having issues TTC and have to plan out when you are going to have sex, it really takes the romance out of things.  I am sure there are those of you out there saying to yourself, "Oh, you could have kept it fun, worn lingerie, used 'marital aids', etc."  Hey, if you haven't had problems TTC (and yes I'm talking to those of you who conceived successfully after one or two cycles) don't judge.  Once you have been TTC for 10 months the fun, spontaneity, and romance definitely flies out the window.  I truly feel for people who deal with infertility and can't even imagine how possibly nonexistent the romance could be in that situation.  Doing it became more of a chore rather than something that was to be enjoyed.  If you've been in this situation you probably know all too well what I'm talking about.  Fast forward to when I finally got pregnant (February 2010) and then things got better-we had lots of fun, did some spontaneous things like going down to Oglebay for a few days, and then along came McKenna in November.  After having her I didn't feel much like doing anything but getting a good night's sleep.  Once we got past the 6 week "don't you dare touch her" period (and yes, we did wait that entire time, I think it might have actually been 7 weeks) I didn't fear and dread doing the deed again.  It was more along the lines of let's do this and get it over with I know it's not going to be the most comfortable thing in the world.  Since baby made 3 not much has been going on.  Sure, we have had a couple of nights where either my Mom or my sister has taken McKenna overnight and we have been able to be spontaneous and romantic again.  It's difficult when we are at home though and she is napping or maybe we have put her to bed and Justin puts his hand on my leg and McKenna starts fussing or crying.  I swear that child has a sensor on her and she knows when we want to get it on.  When we are able to get down to the deed it just is lacking in romance.  Do it, get it done before the baby wakes up, starts fussing, gets us out of whatever mood we may have been in.  Granted, McKenna is only 7 and a half months old so she still has her moments (which results in us not having our moments, if you catch my drift).  I have had friends who have older children assure me that things do get better.  My friend that I was talking to the other night has a little boy who will turn 3 in September.  I don't know how I will deal with this for another 2 years.  I am sure it will get better, just as I am sure that we will have to start putting forth some more effort into "getting romantical" as Justin would say.  We'll have to start doing those fun, spontaneous things again, such as buying flowers and greeting cards "just because".  I may have to pull out the lingerie again, as much as I sometimes think it is a waste (it just comes off anyhow, right)?  I am not a dummy, I know that any relationship takes work, especially a marriage where a child has recently been added to the mix.  Hopefully we will eventually get back to that place where romance was something that we didn't have to really even think about or plan.  I am looking forward to getting to that point again.